A Girl’s Silent Struggle

Is it possible to represent various versions of me? I mean, various roles that I play in my everyday life: my student self, my reflective self, my social self, and so on. This photo-essay captures the multifaceted me and some of my embodied experiences moulded by contexts, relationships, and circumstances. It reflects struggles that define my inner life—mental health, generational trauma, anxiety, identity crisis, and body-image.

‘The Silent Struggle’ captures the unspoken emotions tied to these inner battles. It is a deeply personal journey but also a universal one, as it reflects experiences many people face but are hesitant or unable to talk about. I take an unembellished look at my vulnerabilities.

One of the core influences on this project is the idea of generational trauma—the emotional and psychological wounds passed down through families, often unspoken and unresolved. Growing up in a culture where mental health is rarely discussed, I realised how deeply ingrained silence can be. Certain feelings—like inadequacy, fear, or sadness—are dismissed as weakness, leaving individuals to grapple with their struggles alone. This inherited trauma refrains conversations about topics like mental health, identity, or the pressures to conform, perpetuating cycles of pain and misunderstanding.

A recurring theme in the project is the mental toll of silence and isolation. When individuals feel unheard or invalidated, it can lead to dark thoughts, including suicidal ideation. Through this series, I wanted to visually represent the weight of these emotions without glorifying them. As a subject, I sit curled up, conveying a profound sense of loneliness and despair.

Another significant struggle is the desperation to belong. In a world that increasingly demands perfection—whether through academic achievement, physical appearance, or social performance—many of us feel we don’t measure up. This pressure to fit in, to meet external expectations, often leads to an identity crisis: Who am I if I’m not what others want me to be? Am I enough as I am? These questions became central to the way I chose to represent myself—which is full of turmoil between external validation and internal peace.

‘The Silent Struggle’ is more than a photo series; it’s an attempt to start conversations around topics that are often considered uncomfortable or shameful. Through this visual exploration, I wanted to create a space where these emotions could be acknowledged and validated. By confronting our inner battles, we can begin to heal—not just as individuals, but as a society. My hope is that these images resonate with others, reminding them that they are not alone in their struggles and that it’s okay to seek help, speak out, and embrace their true selves.

The state of silence, the introspection of the mind. Are you alone, or are you lonely? Do you often think about the state you have been through and what affected you and caused you trauma?

Are you showing your true colours? Isn’t it always a shiny side coating your dark side? What stops you from showing your vulnerability, aren’t you tired of pretending?

Are you in search for answers, why did they do that to you? Why you? Aren’t your silent tears looking for answers? Aren’t your unexpressed wounds passing down through your silence?

 Yes, your hands are tied, and you are trapped. How far will you let it trap you?

How loud is your mind? Will you let it overthink the way out?

 The blinding of your generational trauma, will you let it be who you are?

Will you still strive to get near your true happiness? Can you ever get there?

 The points of succumbing to it your wounds, and letting go, accepting and absorbing it.

Are you embodying the pressures of societal expectations so much so that you are letting unseen forces dictate your identity and your inner struggle? Are you truly confronting yourself with your self-perception?

 

This visual project, prepared by Sudarsana Saikia, has emerged out of a course on photographic image taught by Sreedeep Bhattacharya. It was first published on NewsClick and can be viewed here.